Surviving Intimate Terrorism, Hedda Nussbaum
It's been a while since I've posted something I've read. It's not to say I haven't been reading; but I've been "dabbling." I was promoted last summer and the job has taken it's toll on me mentally. I get scatterbrained; a little tired sometimes, and I struggle between writing, watching movies, reading and going out and eating food (I do love food). I dabbled in Sons and Lovers by DH Lawrence. Read most of it and really liked it, but then it waned off. I read some of the graphic novel Hell House, and again, things waned. And so on, and so on... Well, to get my mind to read something, I often turn to crimelibrary.com. I get a good fill there and came across the story of Hedda Nussbaum. I found that she wrote a memoir about her experience called Surviving Intimate Terrorism, so I ordered it.Every two pages makes up it's own chapter. Her story is, of course, a "harrowing" one (though I really do hate that word. It's so... dowdy and morose... But then, so is "morose" and I just used that word. They complement each other well!). It's easy to see while you're reading that she wrote children's books. A terrible thing to think about when you're reading about domestic violence and brainwashing, but it is a book, so I think of these things. She often throws in sarcastic language that I believe could simply be a way to seem more human to a reader (as in, You are reading a book about domestic violence, but in case you aren't yet feeling what I felt, I want to remind you that I'm human; I'm not a novelist; I'm not an award winner; I'm not Gabriel Garcia Marquez; I'm a person; A woman. I was beaten), and though the language, when it shows up, is uncomfortable on all literary levels, it does succeed in reminding you that she was simply a woman who was beaten and a child died in the process of it all, as the result of 12 years of heart-chained torture.
It isn't a literary masterpiece and I don't think anybody involved in it's production would claim it to be; but like all memoirs that share intimate details of downfall and mistakes and intimate pain, it's a work of art to be read if only to share the reminder of fallacy, humanity and weakness. I did not get emotional when I read it, but I shared it with a co-worker who cried so much on her couch, her boyfriend asked her if she could maybe read in another room where her snot wouldn't get all over him.
posted by christen roberts @ 10:43 AM
6 Comments:
I've read "Surviving Intimate Terrorism" by Hedda Nussbaum several times because I was extremely moved by this story. So I'm quite sure that the "quotation" you gave that was supposedly in this book, which you say is sarcastic, is definitely NOT in this book. Here is a quote from your blog. It's what you stated that looks like a quotation from Ms. Nussbaum's book but isn't: "(You are reading a book about domestic violence, but in case you aren't yet feeling what I felt, I want to remind you that I'm human; I'm not a novelist; I'm not an award winner; I'm not Gabriel Garcia Marquez; I'm a person; A woman. I was beaten.)" I think you owe the author an apology.
An opinion does not necessitate an apology.
By "quotations," I'm assuming you are responding to what I have written in italics. This is not a quotation from the book. It is an opinion spoken in a third voice (my third voice) as an example of tone. A tone separate from my first voice, used to set the mood of my own blog entry. Any passages or quotations from books I read are either in quotation marks, or blockquoted. You misread. Perhaps you would not have written as you did had I said, "As if her tone as an author were saying, You are reading a book about domestic violence...."
If I think someone is a bad writer - it does not, in any way, lessen her pain or her experience, or her right to publish a book about it. I commend her for it.
I owe no apology for criticizing an author's writing on a blog about my opinion of others' work. Even if I were to have the opinion you are suggesting.
there is no excuse for letting a child get beat she is a coward just because she is ok with getting hit doesnt give her the right to watch children get beat and she should have been punished
she is the most disgusting person walking around free today
I am personally aquainted with Hedda Nussbaum who is an admirable woman and has been working to help educate women and men about domestic violence for many years now. She gives talks at colleges and to women's groups, she co-facilitates a support group for abused women; and she has written "Surviving Intimate Terrorism," as she has said, to help save another child's life - even though she wasn't able to save the life of her daughter. At Joel Steinberg's trial, a doctor who had examined her testified that she was almost dead herself the night Lisa was struck unconscious Steinberg. Ms. Nussbaum has told me that she wrote her book in simple language so that every woman could read it, regardless of her education.
if anyone has a copy of this book that would be willing to either sell it cheap or lean it to me, i would love to read it as a past abused women. i have very mixed feelings abut her after reading "what Lisa knew" please email me at cakelady13@optonline.net
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